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That Whisper You Hear When You've Just Encountered Creepy

That Whisper You Hear When You've Just Encountered Creepy (Listen to it)

Watch any newscast after a local crime has occurred and you're guaranteed to see an interview with unsuspecting neighbors. Shocked and horrified faces, jolted from their normal routine (usually without makeup or hair done) They can be heard saying things like  ' I am so shocked, he seemed like such a nice guy'...and the like.

That wasn't the case last month when a local softball coach was arrested for sexually assaulting a young girl who played on his team.

No one came forward to say how shocked they were.

Because they weren't.

Well, I  wasn't.

Because this news was not about some random coach somewhere else, coaching someone else's kids.

This was about a coach who once coached a team at our field. Our Levittown field, where I have spent many a season helping myself to other people's loud conversations in the bleachers. You know, because I'm a  writer and that's what I do. I observe everything from the cheese -fry -eating dads to coffee -sipping- moms, to young kids kicking rocks or having a catch.

I've also observed creepy behavior. The kind of behavior that catches your attention once, and you never forget it. Things that just don't look right.

Like a  grown man  greeting his softball players, and other young girls, with a hug. Creepy.  Creepy followed by a whisper that  'something here is not right.'

Enough to convict someone of being a pedophile or a rapist? No.

Creepy as hell? You bethca.

Creepy because I can't think of any occasion where it would be necessary for a grown man to hug a child who he is not related to. A grown man hugging a young girl just to say hello, looks wrong and feels wrong.

When  I was in college, earning my Elementary Ed certification, I recall the warnings we were given from our professors to never touch or be touched by a student. Not even a those little kindergartners who want to hug you hello, hug you goodbye, hug you because they love their teacher. Never.

It is by no means necessary, or appropriate.

So when you bare witness to creepy things and you hear that whisper, do yourself a favor and listen.

Because you know what happens to people who miss the whisper, they are soon subject to the scream.

And in this case, it was in the form of a mugshot in the morning newspaper.

It's too late when it's a scream.

It means lives are already changed and ruined forever.

This post is contributed by a community member. The views expressed in this blog are those of the author and do not necessarily reflect those of Patch Media Corporation. Everyone is welcome to submit a post to Patch. If you'd like to post a blog, go here to get started.

Calvin Klien February 13, 2013 at 12:58 PM
In this particulay situation, I blame parents. I blame the people in the bleachers. I blame you. I have children in three different age groups, sons and daughters. I spend alot of hours at practices and alot of hours at baseball games, I as well observe and overhear lots of things. the Difference? I OPEN MY MOUTH! I read your article and ask myself; if YOU found it so creepy, What did YOU say, what did YOU do? Was it not " Your kid" so not " Your problem"? I find this with alot of people these days. Think about how many people saw these 2 together and no one said nothing? If this happened and I had a "creepy" feeling about it in the first place, I would be so ashamed and disappointed for not stepping up to it myself. Then for you to go on and say no one should be hugging anybody, that would need to reflect on the situation wouldn't it? I also see a coach hug his players and find nothing creepy about it. His daughter is on the team and all his daughters friends are on the team. Same players for the last 3 years or so, they have gotten close. So my opinion of your article is this: You saw this you did nothing. You see other people do other things that perhaps give you a creepy feeling, and you do nothing. But yet you'll tell the world in your article that no one should be hugging anybody thats not related including Kindegarten teachers?? Here's a thought, maybe you shuold have told the creepy guy to keep his hands off the girl he was molesting and worte about that.
Florence Richards February 13, 2013 at 01:06 PM
So true, but the line between "okay" & "creepy" is often blurred by the shear fear to even "think" a simple hug is a "sign" of possible evil lurking in the comfort zone our community. Sad but necessary to inform all.
Shivaun Williams February 13, 2013 at 01:22 PM
Unfortunately , "Calvin Klien", creepy is not a crime and hindsight is 20/20. I still choose to blame the person who committed the crime.
Shannon February 13, 2013 at 01:44 PM
Wow, I mostly agree with "Calvin Klein". My children's teachers have been the best, especially in pre-k & kindergarten and my kids have always hugged them and still do from time to time. I hold the memories of the family atmosphere that I was fortunate to have my kids experience in school close to my heart. It wasn't just a school but an additional family. If I thought for one second that a teacher or coach was "creepy", I sure as hell wouldn't allow he/she to place a hand on my child and would be pulling my child off the team. If I suspected said "creepiness" with another child, I would approach the child's parent and make them aware of my concerns and ot just sit by and watch it happen. No, "creepiness" is not a crime but suspicion is enough to act upon it and bring it to the attention of the proper people, i.e. parents, administrators etc, in order to bring attention to the matter. While I do agree the the person committing the crime is fully at fault but aren't the adults who sit and observe also responsible in protecting our children?
Shannon February 13, 2013 at 01:48 PM
There is a distinct difference between a teacher giving a student an assuring, congratulatory or just a simple affectionate hug vs. groping of a minor . Honestly, I am more shocked that the two could even be compared to one another.. to me it's like apples to oranges.. there is NO comparison.
Calvin Klien February 13, 2013 at 02:33 PM
Soo agree with you Shannon on the comparison. I tried to write that as well but there wasn't enough space/ I have a 13 year old son who just the other night at a open house hugged his pre K teacher. It warmed my heart to see that. @ Shivaun Williams, That "creepiness" is your instincts telling you somethings not right. Your article emplies more than just you saw this going on, more than you thought this was creepy. Those "whispers" confirmed your feelings. .No hind sight needed.
Shannon February 13, 2013 at 02:51 PM
My son just turned 14 and he was in the first class that his pre-k teacher ever taught and she has as special bond with all of her children from that class. So much so that when he graduates 8th grade this year, we are planning a special thank you for her. I am truly appalled that this article/opinion basically implies that because of one this bad coach that we should not allow for a relationship to build between our children and their mentors/teachers. There will always be those out there who will cross a moral line but it is our job as parents to protect our kids and if I had a "creepy" feeling about someone in my childs life or a child I knew (even if the relationship to those other children weren't close), I would of course step in, no questions asked.. even if to just give the old "heads up" to a parent to keep an eye on that situation. I don't agree with this article in the least bit. I am appalled, as I am sure my children's teachers would be as well. Maybe I just have a different opinion because my children's school is small and we all look out for one another and we have a family type bond.
Shannon February 13, 2013 at 05:33 PM
Furthermore, lol.. since I have been thinking more about this and there is no "edit" on previous posts, I am would probably be considered "creepy" as well since when my children's 13-14 yr old and 17-18 yr old friends hug me (and I them) when I see them. Make sure you keep an eye out for me hugging teenagers. Creepy!

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